You Got A Booger

       First of all, have you ever noticed that we usually say “You got a booger” instead of “You have a booger”? That's pretty weird…. Maybe it's just me though. Secondly, there are only two types of people in the world. There are people who want to know they have a booger and those who don't think that they want to know that they have a booger. Why does that even matter? I'm very glad you asked…

      The discovery of a booger is in itself an ordeal. I don't know about you, but while trying to remove a booger, I always wonder how long it has been there, who saw it, and why didn't they tell me. Sometimes I think this one isn't that bad, other times I have used horrible words to describe just how I feel at the moment of discovery. Either way I hate to have them and in my mind it makes it worse when I've worn that booger around people who were close to me and they didn't tell me. Needless to say it's embarrassing and often times disgusting, but boogers are a part of life. You'll have to follow me right here because I have a big booger theory…not a theory about big boogers, but a big booger theory. 

      We, as citizens of the world, in our respective groups, and as members of larger communities do NOT want to know that we have boogers…or we think we don't want to know.

      I'm going to make this as short as possible and cover as many people as I can. You can continue this logic on your own after you understand how I do it and use the information for your own purposes. Please keep in mind that there will always be individuals who fall outside of these boundaries, but this isn't about individuals. Here we go…

      Black people do NOT want to know about the booger of blown opportunities. We'd rather try to get people to understand all of the reasons that led to us blowing opportunity than to recognize that blowing opportunity is just as detrimental as denying opportunity.

      White people do NOT want to know about the booger of destruction and oppression that has been waged on any culture they have come into contact with. They would rather focus on the ills of everyone else's society and culture than to look in a mirror.

      Gay people do NOT want to hear about the booger of impression. They would rather normalize the feminization of boys and masculine identifying of girls instead of actually looking at whether the immersion of our country into homosexual images is affecting impressionable kids.

      The Church does NOT want to hear about the booger of failure. The church would rather search for old glory days than to recognize that it failed as an institution of morality and interconnectivity among its parishioners by limiting God to feeling good and getting money.

      Republicans do NOT want to hear about the booger in the White House. They would rather justify, rationalize, and be blind to blatant lies, stupidity, and gut wrenching hypocrisy than to say we've gone too far in the wrong direction.

      Democrats do NOT want to hear about the booger of weakness. They would rather call attention to trivial matters than to be a worthy political opponents with a true agenda designed to actually galvanize their party.

      Of course we know the police don't want to hear about the booger of murderous racism, doctors don't want to know about the booger of greed, and America doesn't want to know about the booger of bullying. You should know that if you tell these different groups that they have a booger you'll be subject to smears, attacks, and mean looks but the truth about it is, I'd rather know about my booger so I can handle that.