Only You

Ahhhh...those two words sound so sweet. Think of all the beautiful things that could follow...well not this time. It's time for truth telling! This one might hit a little close to home, but that's my whole point.

Why do I say only you? Glad you asked. I say that because so many times we are the only one. The only one who has our experiences exclusively. The only one who knows every little detail about our decision making process. The only one who sees things in a particular way. The only one who carries our peculiar message for our own reasons.

Since life is made of relationships, there are times when we need to recognize that every one else is playing catch up. No matter how close or how distant any single relationship is, the other party will always be playing catch up to the whims of life that steer us. Our own side of life consists of explaining or not explaining what we have done, why we did it, what we were thinking, and how that impacts the people who care about us. That's it.

Where are you? Where were you? Why did you go there? Why did you do that? What were you thinking? Why didn't you ask me? When you gonna be done? What's up for later on? Who is that? Didn't you think about me? What would you mother say??? Who doesn't get tired of answering questions? We all do at some point. I think I know why.The reason is because of a failure to recognize the venue. Venue recognition is a must have to be successful in any relationship. I will be using some common words, but I will be using them in strict discipline so stay with me.

The words for today are stage and platform. We know those words. They are actually closely related, but the subtle differences mean a lot in this arena. The similarities come first. On both you can: make presentations, command attention, wow the crowd, be in the spotlight, take artistic liberties, and strive for acceptance. The difference comes next. The stage is for one act. A platform is presented in response to the positions of the platforms of others.

In our relationships, we have to proceed with venue recognition to enjoy the benefits of having robust and
rewarding relationships. There will always be stage time in a relationship. If someone really cares about you there must be times where they allow you to speak alone without interruption for an undisclosed amount of time. We all need that. But outside of stage time, the relationship has to be more of a platform situation.
Never forget that the other party to the relationship has a point of view as well. It may be extreme, silly, unimportant, or just plain wrong. Does that mean that they don't have a platform? No it doesn't. It means that, if you care, they have something to say and need a chance to present it. As I stated earlier, everyone else is playing catch up. In the process of catching up platforms are established. One who wants "it" to work allows for the presentation of the rebuttal. Think about it...who wants to see the same person on stage all of the time? If you had to see the same show all of the time, wouldn't it be nice to be able to interact with the star at some point? Of course it would.

Now for the important questions. Do you think you are a star? Do you always perform and never share the limelight? Do you allow for others to present their platform in an unfiltered kind of way, or do you try to steer them towards your place before they are finished? Can you deal with the fact that the other party might not agree with you? Do you understand that they are only playing catch up to your moves? Do you care enough about them to walk slow when you need to?

In case you didn't know this...the beginning of every war starts with one party feeling like they have no voice, or their voice is not being heard. Why else would there be fighting? See the truth about it is, stars only shine for a certain amount of time. You could increase your "star" power by only shining when it's time to.