Being Alone SUCKS…

Fact: Being alone sucks.

Fact: The people that say they enjoy it soooo much are lying.

Fact: You can make the best out of it and focus on bettering yourself.

Fact: Being alone sucks.

Fact: The problem with being alone is more than just being alone.

You can decide that my facts are not true and I challenge anyone to that debate.

So now that the initial information has been processed here is the whole deal about being alone. For most people there comes a time when we, for whatever reason, find ourselves without a mate or that special someone. Sometimes it’s for good reason and sometimes it’s for not so good reasons. Either way we are all overwhelmed by the same feelings, emotional roller coasters, and ill-thought through generalizations that plague the other loners.

For most people this becomes a time of reflection and thoughts of personal growth and development. I know for sure that people think about all that led up to the time alone. I also know for sure that people think about personal growth and development at the time. I also know for sure that many if not most people fail to implement anything in the realm of personal growth and development. What I mean by that is we vilify the other person, justify our own mistakes, and then go right back to whatever it was we were doing. That’s all I’m going to say about that because this is about why being alone sucks and not about what to do during “vacation”.

Being alone sucks for many reasons. There is no one there to share laughs. No pillow talk. No immediate person to bounce ideas off of. No help with the bills. Thoughts of inadequacies. I could go on forever but I won’t continue because all of those things pale in comparison to the real reason why being alone sucks.

The worst part; the torturous part; the part that eats away at our insides; the part that really sucks is recognizing you are alone when you REALLY need someone. It’s a horrible thing. That’s the part about being alone that makes people just go get someone to have somebody there for the next time. It will make people settle for people they know are not right or settle for people who have already proven they weren’t right the first time. It makes ugly people look good, dangerous people look harmless, and good-looking people look like gods and goddesses. It breeds lust and irrational thoughts.

No need to worry though…there are plenty of people out there looking for someone and the odds are in your favor but the truth about it is, until you find them…being alone SUCKS. IJS.

Carrots and Sticks

There are two tricks with carrots and stick. Both involve tempting when it comes to the carrots. The stick can be used a couple different ways. It can be used to beat the victim as a part of the mean and evil consequences that arise from being fooled by the carrot into a trap or it can be used to dangle the carrot unassisted in front of the victim. Either way the culprit uses carrots to entice and stick to do something.

If we look at it on a human level, a carrot can be defined as anything desired of us from others. Those things include but are not limited to money, conversation, deeds, activities, accompaniment, sex (appropriate marital status is preferred), and attention. If anyone uses the withholding of any of those types of things in order to manipulate or punish then they are guilty of using carrots and sticks.

The problem with the approach is that the clever criminal doesn’t usually think about what will happen when the carrot dries and becomes withered and begins to rot and stink and gets those funny looking spots of mold on it. No prey will chase a carrot like that into a trap. Not even a fool will continue to chase the things they want for eternity so there should be a recognition that they will not chase what they don't want anymore for anytime at all.

So here it is for me, you, and everyone else…If you do it with money, be prepared when your money gets funny. If you do it by not speaking to the other person, be prepared when they start talking to someone else. If you do it by denying the needed things for your own people, be prepared when someone else starts doing it. If you do it by refusing to do anything with your significant other, be prepared when they do it with someone else. If you do it by refusing to go places with your partner, be prepared when they go with someone else. If you do it with sex and attention…then you already know.

At a certain point, whatever carrot that is being dangled spoils or rots or begins to decay. Money doesn’t captivate forever because someone else always has more.  Not speaking bears no good results it only further erodes lines of communication. Selling someone out hurts the trust and there is nothing more difficult to repair than trust. Quality time doesn’t matter when the other person no longer desires to spend time with you. Always sending your partner out alone will eventually lead to a meeting between them and that perfect stranger. The sex trick becomes tedious when things are no longer in the same places because our bodies age and don’t have the same raw appeal after a while. Shunning someone has never made the shunnee appreciate the presence of the shunner.

The truth about it is, carrots and sticks is the most dangerous game. Carrots are perishable…The stick is another story.