You Got ‘Em Pregnant

This one goes out to everyone in the entire functional world! (Some people for various reasons are not functional) It’s rare that I have a thought big enough to consider it relevant to the entire world, but I think I may have stumbled upon one.

Now we all know who gets who pregnant. If you don’t know that one then send me an email or something so I can counsel you through a wealth of information. But here it’s about who gets what pregnant. Everyone in the functional world is tasked with making certain things we call decisions. We have to decide a multitude of things on an hourly level. Unless we are asleep, then the decision making process is an ongoing process. It’s the never-ending app that drains the batteries of our souls. Some may think that decisions equal results and that’s how the world works. I say wait one minute…it’s not that easy.

I don’t believe we even actually make decisions. That would mean that as an individual we have a say so in all that will happen from that action. I believe there is a difference in thinking you are making a decision and actually impregnating a choice. That’s right. We are not making decisions we are getting our choices pregnant.

The gestation of the choice embryo varies in every pregnancy and many times the due dates happen at the same time in different time zones and locations. There is no way to be around for every live birth but you’d better believe that it has been recorded somewhere. Oh the horror of having to take care of offspring that age faster and get sassy quicker than their twin. It is the saddest event, to watch some of the newly born wither before your very eyes. How strange it is to see the birth of something that is old and wrinkled upon entry into the world. How heartbreaking it is for one of them to grow from being such a beautiful little one to becoming a horrid beast at maturity. It is so out of place watching the birth of a pubescent decision. How tiring it is to keep up with all of them at the same time. But there is still a worse reality that lies ahead…

The offspring, for the most part, quickly reproduce and usually it is at an alarming rate. These are not bunnies or fish, these are the most prolific creation of all time. They are our choices and each one of us is responsible for the offspring that comes from us.

The truth about it is, the next time you start complaining about everything happening you should look at those fine and sexy choices and realize that you got ‘em pregnant.